top of page

How to NOT Hate in your Relationships

Lately when I am talking with clients, I have noticed some themes related to relationships with other people. One is the amount of anger, disappointment, and sadness people have in some of their relationships with friends, family, spouses or partners and they don’t know what to do with it.

Is this you?

Let’s do something about it because any emotion left to fester can turn into bigger (usually negative) things.

Step 1. Check your attitude at the door.

The “I’m right, you’re wrong” does not apply here as it shuts down healthy communication. Check any black and white thinking at the door and open your mind to conversations different than in the past.

Step 2. Stay in your lane.

Before you start criticizing what others have done or not done, consider making observations about your feelings, wants, needs and beliefs about behaviors. For example, “I would feel less anxious if you would please not yell while we talk.”

Step 3. Give each other space.

Even if you are confined to a small space, there are ways to give each other physical and emotional distance. Consider scheduling time alone, connecting with people outside of your home or going out for a walk. Take time for yourself and model behaviors helpful to others, including kids.